January 15, 2006
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…it is a new year…
i am glad there was snow when i left the airport… it had been too long in undefined seasons… there was some confort in that… some relief… and some sorrow…
as there must be.
it was nice to see my family. (all of them, flooded train ride and all) surreal to be at my parents house again, sitting by a fireplace and looking at puzzles… reality is so subjective.
…the holidays ended so quickly. and then i moved in with the boy i love more than any other on this planet. i was born in this city. Hillsboro, OR. …with the mona lisas and madhatters…taking interpreting prereqs again… again… some things come full circle … then repeat themselves. i’m either dense or classical… because my life is full of CODAs.
…do you ever feel like Psyche? (have you read Till We Have Faces?) …sometimes i wonder if Cleopatra syndrome is really in convincing the others… or convincing yourself. I still say Ophelia is her eldest daughter. … and where am I?
when is anything anything without its opposite?
…why can i so easily release and let go and allow the waves to take me when i am thrashed into the sand… but not when i sleep at night?
Evan took me to dinner at a Moroccan restaraunt tonight… and i could breathe again… regardless of anything else, this time with my brother is precious.
oh, “i thank the Lord, for the people i have found” … but i wonder to worry, if vienna really waits for me.…maybe my best protective boundaries would be found in my own silence… to protect me from myself
Lord, be my ocean
…it is a new year…
Comments (19)
Glad to hear you’re back home and had a wonderful time, even if it was ‘eventful’ with the flooding and whatnot. I love you dear friend, and I’m thinking of ya. (ps. that crazy 402 # on your phone is still coming from nebraskaland). Take care Erin *HUGS*
I am persistently jealous of your mobility. I live vicariously through your adventures. One day, one day… It looks like I’m moving up in your general direction next year- nothing certain, and you may not even be there by then, but my first choice for grad school is UW.
yes I will be. Will you have time available?
hey r u really from tunisia cause i am but i live in oklahoma well comment me back
i really wish to talk sometime and i too will be in portland. 615-480-8059
hey i got ur comment i think that ‘s cool u went there to study arabic i’m from nabeul well my parents were i was born in ohiob but i live in oklahoma i go to tunis every summer well where do u live
Hey E,
We will be in Portland and Tacoma this year.
what the heck???
spill spill..
details needed much??
hahah
just kidding..
be free sister…
but an email from you would be splendid…
i love you.
p.s.
lovely background!
YOUR BACK!!!!!!! I MISS YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
well if it isn’t!
which number should i call you at? i’ve been longing for a convo.
and tihs move to new york is taking more out of me than i thought. i have to make sure that i’m leaving my job here with high marks so that when i transfer there won’t be crap. etc. etc. etc.
arg.
who am i? and what the heck am i doing?
It was so nice to see you… thanks for persevering the two day train ride…!
How was the move for you and your bro? please to tell him i said hi!
We re-arranged the apartment and it looks so much better!
I love you erin shute…
so i just read your post. and wow.
i think it’s okay that your life is full of codas. the codas — at least for me — give me that final breath, that last chance to leave ” a mark” on something. it does get tiring, though, because you OD have to get back out there and finish . . . even if you have nothing left (of course i’m relating this to a coda as in ballet.)
“when is anything anything without its opposite?” it takes some old to know some young . . . it takes some cold to know the sun . . . it takes the one to have the other. you’ve hit it, shute. nothing IS nothing without it’s opposite. not even g*d. (and i think you know what i mean by that.)
thank you. for existing. for walking onto the stage of my life. for random hugs (that were QUITE dismissable) that weren’t so random to me, but rather perfectly timed. thank you for a lot.
hey yeah i do love oklahoma its like the best really good friends but i only lived in ohio for only like 2 years so i don’t really remember things so yeah cool talking to u bye
i tried to call but it said the number was disconnected…do you have a new number? so sorry about our phone date…let’s talk soon…my Mom just left after being here for 10 days so life was a bit hectic and not much time for the phone…i miss you and i promise i want to talk more…sometimes i should just call even if i don’t have a LOT of time and we can talk still even if it’s short…and then we can do it again and again:) I get hung up on thinking I don’t have a couple of uninterrupted hours like i would like…but i will still call now…when you give me your number…
now that i’m done rambling:)
haha, I decided I’ll come up to Portland Saturday…gonna stay home Friday night to unwind and spend some time with poor neglected Eliyah… :-/ Are you gonna be around Saturdya? Give me a call.
PC
=) just dropping in to say hi.
ahhhhhhhhh…… your backround is so lovely. it brings back a flood of memories…. jasmine is my favorite, did you know? where are you now? i think i should call. so i need a #.
so you live in hillsboro now?
so u have forgotten me?
well..i do miss you.
hope life is goig better than great for you..
i think of you and here i end up..
but u are not here!
love to you.