May 17, 2006

  • ...it's been a while for all of us...

    i am wonderfully well. so many things are happening. so far loving work.

    so many birthdays --and births-- going on.

    Evan got accepted to the Physical Therapy program at Chapman and at Pacific... i can't believe my brother is going to have a doctorate...

    ...still waiting to hear about one of my applications, and the big one is far too rapidly approaching...

    global warming is giving me a tan... any day now...

    and a special message for corey wright and the venerable date may 18th:

    eid miiladu saiid, eid miiladu saiid, eid miiladu saiid, eid miiladu saiid.

April 28, 2006

  • ...sometimes i forget how important hope is...

    today was the first day i can remember that i considered not applying to the grad school program i *really* want to attend...

    my heart longs for so many things...

    spes quae videtur non est spes

April 19, 2006

  • Rumi:

    Come, come, come
    whoever you are
    wonderer
    worshipper
    lover of leaving
    It doesn't matter
    ours is not a caravan of despair
    come, even if you have broken your vow
    a thousand times
    Come yet again
    come, come

April 17, 2006

  • my interview for the interpreting program is in the morning!
    you know how the nights you really need sleep, its the hardest to get?

    ---------------------------------

    ...you know its a good day when you reach into your pocket and find a surprise...
    a ticket from the London Underground...

    ...the interview went well... if I don't get in it won't be because of incompetence at the interview.

April 6, 2006

  • ...you know youve been playing too much mariokart when you turn left and imagine a giant turtle shell being hurled at your bumper...

    currently reading:
    Michel Foucault Beyond Structuralism and Hermeneutics

    LA was fun. ...there was laughter. Pirates. family. friends that are classified as family. i am oh so thankful.

    my parents are in Mexico and I'm so proud. It's my mothers first trip to Mexico (though she grew up in LA) and my fathers first trip out of the country... and while they will likely not experience much of the country itself, i'm thrilled. They called me and had me meet them at the airport to assist in filling out customs forms and what not. i felt old telling them to be safe and call if they needed anything... my mom tries to text me in espanol... but alas, she knows far more than I. its so great. still smiling.

    I was trying to kill some time a couple days ago and ended up walking through a mall, and walking by the norstroms window i saw... seat belt bags. They were identical to my purse only bigger... I very much hope that the small independent vendor from which i purchased mine got picked up and is now making better money, oppose to selling out their idea...

    find a Teavana near you and go there.

    my brother evan:

    with my cousin Laura:

    the money shot:

March 21, 2006

  • Note: I apologize to those of you who have been trying to reach me to no avail... i am going to California for a week and will likely be unreachable- though you are welcome to try. I do love you all. Special apologies go out to Java and Harrison-- the whole time zone difference is not helpful... but its my turn to try again, please forgive me.

    -------------------------------------

    - i don't really get the whole "FRIEND" thing on xanga... they must be losing business to myspace... but oh well... que sera sera.

    - my grandfather has pneumonia. he is quite old. has already been diagnosed with parkinsons and cancer... evan and i have been planning a road trip to cali over spring break to celebrate in the sun... but it seems the visit may become less than celebratory. it gets harder for me everytime i see them... they are becomming so frail... and i am starting to really understand how short the time is. if you have time, desire, and energy, please say a prayer for my grandparents.

    - my cat died this weekend. i went home to see my parents. it was the first time since i was 6 she hasn't been there. she lived for 16 years so that is rather amazing. still... feels ominous.

    -not everything is sad. i got to spend friday night with a dear friend whom i have not seen much of for too long. she and her new husband provided company and shelter, and a mini tea party in the morning with my old landlord while the boys all went to a sort of impromptu men's breakfast... i was enriched just to get to see her.

    -i am feeling so torn about future plans... and making them. even telling someone what schools i'm applying to carries some weighty finality i avoid with the pronoun game. there are so many things my heart longs for... and i am not yet willing to abandon one dream for another... oh my impatience...

    ...have i always been this afraid of commitment? ...i feel it now more than ever.

    ------
    2 of my many cousins, Caralee and Caitlyn, in spokane:

March 8, 2006

  • i'm am going to force myself to keep this short and limited ...

    yesterday was the orientation for the interpreting program...
    my interview is April 18th 10:00am... i'm already nervous.

    my mind was spent from exercises all day... if any of you want to try one, watch a tv show, any tv show, and repeat aloud everything being said, while you are doing this write down numbers in spanish, or french, or farsi, or italian... it doesn't matter. when you reach 100, start over and count by 2s, then by 3s, etc... the simultaneous activity helps to train your brain for multitasking while distracted, like the skills neccessary for interpreting. and there you go. I assure you, it is quite entertaining if you try with friends and don't let yourself get frustrated.

    context context context

    i have been saying all kinds of things that have been misunderstood lately. "to the pure all things are pure" ...i keep telling myself... but still... on sunday i was with dear friends and when saying goodbye made a comment that had more meanings that i intended... it wouldn't be as funny now, but at the time i was mortified...

    last night in ASL my prof was changing subjects and i noticed a phrase i did not know how to sign on the list in front of me. I asked her, as is the custom, and she showed me. most of the class was not paying attention and so she asked me to voice the sign for those who were now confused with what she was doing. so I complied and immediately calmly voiced "piss-off" while my classmates looked at me crosseyed. i must admit, it was funny. FYI: speaking in ASL class is beyond prohibited... it will get you kicked out of class, especially when the prof is Deaf, as mine is. She occasionally asks students to voice something, but for those not paying attention...it was funny. like those "don't judge too quickly" commercials.

    note to all: call your friends. they miss you.

    ...and on a special note: Corey Wright, i am not longer jealous you went to that Ailey class without me... they are comming here next week... and i will be enjoying "Revelations" on wednesday night. ...it shall make me miss you even more.

March 5, 2006

  • some blurry visions of my weekend:

    jen:

    jackie:

February 28, 2006

  • ...cant believe its fĂ©vrier already... and the end of it at that...

    oh there are things to say. important things that elude me.

    so instead ill tell of simple ones

    ...it took me 3 years to use the Borders gift card i won during a debreifing game on the MT. i carried it around in my wallet until a couple days ago. I wasnt saving it or anything. Most of the time i simply forgot it was in there. ...and i usually spend more than $15 when i go there (...and now whenever i can i just go to Powells...). I suppose i could have wanted in case of an emergency... *i spend money on books before i spend money on food... at times it is a bit unhealthy... i admit. But walking up to the register with those 4 books in my hand... i suddenly remembered the card in my wallet, and not usuing it when i had the opportunity simply seemed obsurd. how odd that it took so long to remember such a small thing every time i bought some books... sometimes it is so easy to forget things that make so much sense. ...oh i do it far too often...

    cars...

    Tiffany decided to have her baby shower as close to the birth of her son as possible... [Travin Stadler was born just a few days ago... a little guy at 5.7 still outweighed both his sisters... all are well]
    we hosted the shower at my parents house... although, the royal "we" is not truly appropriate in this circumstance. My parents are both in Florida... my mother has been there for a month now... on the whim of one of their country club friends who decided to cheer herself out of her "im turning 50" glum by spending a month in a florida condo with friends... its a rough life, i'm sure... but my parents are having a blast and for that i am grateful. ...However, the Atlantic beach party meant that I would have to host the shower at my parents house alone... so i drove the 5 hours northeast, happy to help Tiffany and excited to get some alone time. ...Tiffany and i have known each other since we were 8... i have scars to tell stories of our adventures ... the ones you have as adolescents... where the world looks completely understandable and you are invincible... and your heart is perpetually broken... Tiffany was my sister, my twin, and my partner in crime... and i was happy to host her shower... ... ... but i forgot about all her high school friends. Tiffany was a cheerleader. She morphed from a hick to a prep some time freshman year... and though she maintained her charming heart... her friends were far less attractive to me. I had forgotten that they would be the attendees. C'est la vie. I served them punch and talked with the english teacher for a while, the dancer who studied in spain, and the friend of my parents... and trying to make sure that Tiffany had a great time and ignoring the surprised "oh *you live here?"s from the girls... i had forgotten all about them... and frowned at myself to discover pettiness present at remembering them. In the end I believe i conquored the inner beast and all had a great time. ...though i was thankful when everyone departed, i admit.
    ...the next day i was packing things up in my car to take back to the apt (essentials... like books and paint) the neighbor came up and abruptly asked "do you know who's car this is?" ... i was a bit stunned... (this is not the kindly cup-of-sugar neighbor... but the if-your-dog-barks-one-more-time-Ill-call-the-humane-society-neighbor) I smiled and asked her what she meant... and she pointed out the red handa that had run into her house... leaving marks over my driveway and lodging itself in her garden, and against her window... my jaw dropped and i tried to think of someone with such a car... to no avail. I called my father, who fortuitously was just going on lunch, and she called the police... i had all kinds of stories running through my head about stolen vehicles and drunken driving... at 1 in the afternoon... and then i knocked on another door... and the story turned from scary to sad. The tearstained teenager emerged shaking... she had put her things in the car, and forgotten to check the e-brake... the car had simply rolled accross the street... into the unfriendliest neighbor's house... the policeman showed up just before my dad... fortunately he was kindly and helped make some peace... playing down the event as much as possible... my dad and i went out to lunch after making sure that ashley was ok, and the neighbor wasn't too shaken up by the crash... then i drove on home again... over that pass...

    then there was evan's meet in Seattle (see the previous post) ...it was sunday afternoon and i was tired... not just i, in fact, we were all tired. We fell asleep in the car while dad went inside to wait for announcements on when finals would begin. ...3 hours later i woke up and decided i should go in and check on things too... but one touch to the door handle and "beep beep beep beep" the alarm goes off. Now, WHY would the alarm go off if the door is opened from the *inside? but it did. ...and, just my luck, there was a security guard stading right accross the parking space. he sauntered over and asked what was going on... trying to sleepily explain myself wasn't working well... and he had to detain me untill my father came out and showed him the key to demonstrate that i actually belonged to the car...

    ...cars

    ...i took this test what seems like years ago... it could have been... still scored the same...
    good thing internet quizes with 5 questions are so accurate, huh?

    ...still didn't help me with the cars though...


    You're the United Nations!

    Most people think you're ineffective, but you are trying to
    completely save the world from itself, so there's always going to be a long
    way to go.  You're always the one trying to get friends to talk to each
    other, enemies to talk to each other, anyone who can to just talk instead of
    beating each other about the head and torso.  Sometimes it works and sometimes
    it doesn't, and you get very schizophrenic as a result.  But your heart
    is in the right place, and sometimes also in New York.


    Take the Country Quiz
    at the Blue Pyramid

    ______________

    and on that note... i beg forgiveness from Joy and Yasmin... and the countless others who know who you are... you are not forgotten...

    ...and thank the lovely jen gable for another lovely weekend

    lovely lovely lovely

    in the words of a Tunisian favorite: "life is life"

February 14, 2006