October 2, 2005

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  Ramadan starts on Teusday/Wednesday depending on the moon;

  
  

   

  
  

  Tunisia just had their Daylight Savings switch this week, so for a month ill be only 8 hours ahead of PST, and 5 hours ahead of EST.  Still excited to hear from dear ones. 

  
  

  i cannot find journals anywhere.  i swear i have been to every Librariè in Tunis... they have small _50 sheet, half page, grid paper_ notebooks for school... but that just wont do... i am too picky.  Soon i will be desperate and will have to use one anyway.

  
  

  ...i miss PF Changs... and all the people with which iùve eaten there.

  
  

  I still hqve henna on ,y hand from our trip to Kairouan on Wednesday;  __for those of you unfamiliar; there are cities holy to Islam, Mecca is first; then Medina, Jerusalem is third, and Kairouan is forth.  We went to the oldest mosque in Africa.  Karim suggested that I always have a scarf to cover my head _many women in Tunis donùt cover their heads until they are around 30... also the age many of them marry... yes, Tunisia is very different__ so that he could take me into mosques.   happy to say the black silk doesnt look so badover my hair... ... ... it was amazing... the Islamic capitol of North Africa...   no words.

  
  

  also went to Takrouna__small Berber villiage on the way to Kairouan. sat and drank tea for about an hour, then had ...very fresh... lamb... ... donùt ask.  __most people i know think that the Berbers are Moroccan.  it is true that there is a large population of Berbers there, but Berbers qre qctuqlly the indiginous people of Tunisia.  ...they're from here. 

  
  

  ...and everyday i stare at my feet _like an emo kid without a camera_ and in amazement tell myself the places they are treading.  ...if 4 years ago id have been told that i would be here, i would not have been surprised, but excited.  ...i am thankful it looks so different from how I imagined.  Every day old desires in my heart are fulfilled a moment before they are remembered... and then I freeze in awe of everything i am experiencing.

  
  

  Currently weve been having classes MTRF, with trips on W and Saturday and 4 hour classes on Fridays.  Once Ramadan starts we will have class 6 days a week, since travel will be extremely difficult.  ...i dont have enough film.

  
  

  speaking of film: here is a photo of us playing Monopoly in Tunisian Arabic... as you can see, we needed dictionaries.  Gina and i are attempting to read a "chance" card i think.  Erica and David are not in the photo, but Erica is the one with all the money... she smoked us all.  And i realized as i saw this photo that --at least on here-- there are not many picutes of me where im looking at the camera... apparently my eyes are sacred and cameras are not allowed to see them... I'll try to remedy that soon.  But i am at the mercy of ;y roommates photo collection, so please be patient.  (the picture is in our flat)

  
  

  

  
  

  these are the other students here: from right to left, David, Rachel, Erica, Alison, Gina, and Boram

  
  

   

  
  

  I actually took this picture... in Kairouan:

  
  

   

  
  

  ...and THIS, this is Karim in an olive tree...

  
  

  

  
  

  ...hopefully more shall follow.

  
  

  my coursemates are very communal and i love it.  we are humorously intimate though we only met recently.  every meal is family style_as it should be_ and every night each house contacts the others to make sure we're all safe.  ...ive had my first few outings alone... and i have mixed feelings.  life and death hangs on the taxi driver__who may or may not know how to drive his car, may or may not have a liscence, may or may not know where anything in Tunis is, may or may not speak a language you know, may or may not be a rapist, and may or may not be having a good day.  I am not exaggerating.  Taxis can be cheaper than bus fare, which are entirely unreliable and even less safe.  There are crazy cultural rules here that sometimes piss me off and sometimes i only notice after i realize ive been following them for a week.  when it starts to get dark, it is simply no longer safe, as a woman, to be out alone.  girls disappear from public life and men emerge in disturbing numbers.  i have never in my life had so many languages and ...phrases... hurled at me, and i have never in my life been more uncomfortable.  Ive been followed home on foot, followed in cars; been grabbed and pulled, ...last night i went with my roommates to a cafe to meet our friends from the program and their host family and friends for a birthday party.  the__much further than er thought__ walk there was filled with so many comments, invitations, yelling, following, and attempts to get us into cars that i started to find tears on my cheeks.  the cafe itself was very crowded, but only a few incidents occured there __men get in your face and grab you here... it is beyond uncomfortable.  afterwards we went back to their house and talked with Imal _the birthday girl_ and Oussama__who insists that americans call him Sam, so as not to "frighten" them.  Imal was almost in tears herself talking about how she desperqtely wanted to move to Canada and get out of Tunisia__largely because of the men__  and that she just could not take a life with no hope, that the cost was too high.  at that moment, Oussama, who does not speak english well began a rant on how the price of coffee was, absolutely, too high and how awful it was.  his sister laughed, but looked back at me and mouthed "too high".  She has offered to give me Tunisian dance lessons __more specialized than general Belly Dancing.  David saw Gina and Erica and I into a cab, and when we arrived home, the cabby discharged us quickly and drove away.  there was a car parked in front of our gate with the lights on, engine running, and packed with guys.  the three of us walked to the door, disturbed, and one of them opened the car door and began the usual rant of things we hear each day.  he got out of the car and started toward us and Erica was shaking as she tried to get the keys into the gate.  I slammed the gate behind Gina and we hurried to our front door, silently freaked out.  The car didnt drive away for a while...  i was less than pleased. 

  
  

  ive been told that the biggest reason why women leave Tunis__tunisian and foreign alike__is because of the men.  On the up side, i have met a couple who seemed to have only the motive of practising English in talking to me, and nothing else.  at the Embassy on Friday __we went for Rachels birthday, she wanted a drink and being a muslim country, beer is not readily avaliable... though i question the safety of drinking with most marines almost as much... I met a man named Housnouii who was an English Lit major, and was trying to organize a club where Tunisians could meet with native speakers of English to practice.  I also met Hype, he is half Tunisian and half French... he teaches Salsa dance and offered to give us dance lessons.  David is stoked because he is meeting his girlfriend Chrisana in Spain after the program and wants to surprise her.  i am stoked because any chance i have to dance is freedom to my heart. 

  
  

  it is hilarious the networking capabilities that can emerge out of this trip even already.  Karim himself must seriously be part of the Tunisian Mafia... Gina is a biochemistry student on her way to being a natreopathic MD, she lived in Naples for a year and speaks Italian almost fluently, Erica is going to be a lawyer__she is another one who looks pretty good on paper and i imagine will be able to go just about whereever she likes__, Rachel is working on a publishing thesis and wants to be a book editor, Alison is studying to be an Environmental Engineer__probably in Africa, David lived in Brasil for a year and is hoping to become a neurologist, like his grandfather;  Boram is a pharmacy student who wants to move to South Africa, there are a numer of Fulbrighters ive met here, Pauline among the most mentionable, organizations that i could be a part of as well;  opportunities have arisen with  CEMAT a scholarly research center; AMIDEAST, an English teaching and exchange program, The Red Crescent, NAs version of The Red Cross, and a couple random people Karim has introduced us to.  it makes me laugh... but oh I am thankful.

  
  

  ive been sick since i got here.   fever, shivering and shaking, every stomach problem one can have, headaches that pound and give me vertigo... there is serious pollution here, and -everyone- smokes, all the time, everwhere, with unfiltered cigarettes that make me disdain it more everyday... black lungs are not good for dancing... and i am becomming concerned that my symptoms are not going away... its been weeks now... 3?  yes, exactly 3 weeks today;  wow.  Ma'Sha' Allah. 

  
  

   

  
  

   ...I pray that I marry a man who speaks French. 

  
  

  not because it is beautiful... just because I need it SO often and I have so very little.  Language is comming tremendously slower than id like, or than is beneficial.  i dont really fel like i am learning anything.  We spend hours in class on Classical Arabic, then talk to Tunisians who only speak Tunisian, or at best Maghrebi dialect, and then to merchants and the French students who always speak french.  It is too many languages to be immersion; and my brain shuts down __or, oddly enough, switches to ASL..; as if it doesnt want to hear anymore__  it frustrates me to no end. 

  
  

  ...and i need to study more.  i am slacking on my homework because of being here, a serious lack of resources to which i am accustomed, actually having my BA, and... because when i get access to the internet i spend a lot of time writing on here instead of doing reseach.  ...most of my classmates just told there friends at home they would be gone till december and theyd catch up then... but... we have a different situation than that.  And __my life at least__ does not work that way.  despite the fact that most of the people reading this live far from one another... im not going back to a particular school at the moment and, everday more opportunities arrise for me to stay here longer; which, honestly, iùd love to do... in spite of the creepy men. 

  
  

  ...the problem is that I just want to do too many things.  i want to Stay in Tunisia and really learn the language.  i want to go to Lebanon and study classical Arabic, i want to teach in Saudi, i want to stay in North Africa, I want to go to grad school in Europe, i want to go to grad school at all, i want to be done with school, i want to dance, i want to get married, i want to interpret, i want to be in the Northwest, i want to be abroad, i want to come home for Christmas, i want never to get on a plane again, i want to write, i want to roam, i want to live near my best friends...  and as much of a make-it-happen girl as i am; i just cant do everything.  Certianly not by myself... and adding other people into the equation brings their dreams and desires and fears and everything else that makes relationships complicated. 

  
  

   

  
  

  the truth is that i am really looking forward to Ramadan.  _sigh_ "shoiya shoiya" i will just have to take it little by little.

  
  

   

  
  

  and in my best Tunisian:

  
  

  "Barakllahufik"

  
  

   

  
  

   

  • 12:33 pm
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